Hello Reader :)
HAPPY 2020!
It's been a great journey in 2019 with incredible people around me, who has remarkably influenced my life positively. That is one of the reasons I started writing a blog. I thank everyone for your extended support in this journey of my life!
Today I would like to share my knowledge about Parenting. It's not only for the biological parents but also for the ones who care for the children and who would love to guide and channelize the child's energy in an appropriate manner.
To speculate I want you to focus on the following questions.
- As a parent what is your biggest parenting challenge?
- How as a parent you are contributing to your child's growth and development?
- What are the factors that you think will affect your child's growth?
Once you have found the answer for above-mentioned questions you would be able to connect to the descriptive image below (Please note that the image was taken from the google source). It's a glimpse of our growth and the children's personality development.
As a parent or an adult a few things, we must put into practice.
- Listen. Cultivate the habit of listening. Children need to be heard. Do not assume even before they say something. There is a higher chance for the children to lose trust in you
- Punishing or threatening the children for bad behaviour might get your work done but it isn't real cooperation. You can expect similar behaviour repeated.
- word your phrase appropriately that leaves no room for 'NO' answer. For example, say 'I want you to clean up your space' instead of 'Will you clean up your space?'
Yes, kids do back talk and we perceive it as disrespectful. How have you handled it? You must have used one of these by scolding, hitting or punishing.
If you find variation in the voice tone or screaming while correcting the bad behaviour of your child remember that you are an adult to not to respond in the same manner. Let's hold on to an adult ego state while handling the child ego state. For example, you can simply tell the child to speak to you in a manner that will not attack you. So that the child will learn to respond rather than to react.
Encourage positive communication rather than directly telling 'No' to your child. If the child is non-negotiable you have to remain firm how harder it may be so that you don't have to face a similar situation in the future and the child learns the value of the same.
If you have used a different technique and found a positive outcome I request you to please share in the comment box.
Parent need to be a parent. Placing too many demands and being rigid will frustrate the child. Being empathetic and understanding the emotion of the child is very important to guide them appropriately. The above image (Please note that the image was taken from the google source) tells us how we need to be with our kids at different stages of a child's life. Since we are the role models we need to behave in a manner that we want our kids to be. For instance, give respect and take respect, be honest and you will see the honesty in your child, never break the trust so that you will earn the trust etc. Most importantly if you smile your kid will also smile.
Case Study
I would like to give an example of a child who had behavioural issues like not responding when called once, dominating, teasing, hitting, shouting when he doesn't get what he needs, blaming and not accountable. These were the behaviours observed on a regular basis in the school. After a few counselling sessions and talking with the parents it was understood that the child has inherited from one of the family members. He has observed and imitated that behaviour towards his classmates, peer group and teachers. However, the child is subdued at home. Later the child's behaviour has mellowed down along with the parents' coordination.
It is important to note here that our behaviour as a parent is very much essential to be utmost positive in the presence of the children.
If you have read until the end then I am sure that you would agree with few of my inputs given here.
Thank you so much for your support and please do comment in the comment box because it helps me to improve.
Sangeetha :)
A lovely article. Keep Going:)
ReplyDeleteThank you Ma'am:) for your continuous support 😊
DeleteI have learned it in case of my own children and what I noticed and observed is that the children, knowingly or unknowingly, emulate and imitate what we as adults do and how we react in different situations. I must state that you have put forward highly relevant points in a simple yet effective manner. Thank you, Sangeetha. We demand more. :-)
ReplyDeleteThank You Vineet for those positive and encouraging words. Your motivating words has an impact.
DeleteYou deserve it every bit, Sangeetha.
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